tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-39384709149409909862024-03-05T19:45:54.786-06:00A Journey That Only Lasts A LifetimeMy Faith.
My Life.
My Trials.
My Love.
My Advice.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.comBlogger117125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-75156460632636342392015-03-02T14:58:00.001-06:002015-03-02T14:58:20.044-06:00SnowfallCan I just say what a blessing these last few days have been? You all have probably noticed that Texas has gotten a bit of snow! Well, I love snow. And I love the serenity that comes with it (if you don't count the horrible conditions of the roads). <br />
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My last blog post contained a bit of a searching tone; I have been concerned about a few things in my life and am at that "graduating senior" stage where graduation is imminent and uncertainty is a part of life. But, I've had the greatest calm come with that for the last couple of weeks. It is a wonderful feeling. I don't know how it happened or why I feel this way. I think it started with the snow. Friday morning I felt so <em>happy</em>. I wanted to share it with everyone around me. I hesitate to write all of this in case I jinx this feeling. But, here I go...<br />
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How do I describe it? Despite everything that has gone on this semester, the stress, the tasks in front of me, I don't feel afraid. I feel excited. I feel so ready to go into the world and start working as a nurse. I am so excited about life! I feel at peace about jobs after graduation. Have I applied to any yet? No. Have the applications opened for hospitals in Colorado yet? Not quite (but almost). Are people getting jobs already here in Texas? Yes. But I still don't feel afraid. I know God has it in His hands. I know He is going to put me where I need to be. Am I going crazy trying to get my thesis done? Yes. Am I going to finish it eventually? Yes. Is God going to take care of me? Yes. I haven't had very many periods like this in my life in the past four years. I have been constantly learning, constantly adapting, constantly worrying. Granted, I've had quite a few breakdowns, but for some reason this past week I have just felt secure. I've learned so much about myself and about life these past four years. And I know God has me, and He has you, in His hands. God has not stopped walking beside me...ever. And I am going to be alright.<br />
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What can I say? I love the snow. I love the serenity it brings. I love quiet, uninterrupted snowfall. I love waking up in the morning to a white blanket on the ground. I love the promise of playing in the snow and then coming in for a quiet night of reading/watching a movie and something hot to drink. And I love that I could have a reminder of footprints in the snow this past weekend. It's like footprints in the sand, but much more Colorado style! <br />
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<em><strong><span style="color: #6aa84f;">"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me."</span></strong></em></div>
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<strong><span style="color: #6aa84f;">-Psalm 51:10-12</span></strong></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-25984191876561150312015-02-09T12:47:00.001-06:002015-02-09T12:47:25.916-06:00Letting GoI've been mulling over thoughts in my mind as I have tried to consider what I would blog about in this next post. For some reason, I just couldn't get a good grip on what in the world I wanted to write about. I always have to go back to what my foundations are for starting this blog. I just want to share my faith journey and what I struggle with. I try to humanize some of the struggles I go through and how God gets me through at all times in my life. I write in hopes that I can relate to some of you and hopefully give you some encouragement. <br />
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God has been teaching me a few things these last few weeks. Many of the sermons/talks/devotions that I've been exposed to recently have been concentrating on one thing: spending time with God. Now, I'm not stellar in this department. I don't know if I ever have been. But, lately, I've felt some gaps in my life and I feel like I'm getting the message to fill those gaps with God. "Well duh, Morgan", you say. Of course I know this, but it's not quite as easy as people make it out to be. You may do a daily devotion, but are you truly spending time with God throughout your day? I've felt some loss in my life lately. It's almost as if I'm grasping at thin air trying to get it back. This has just led me to think...<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">When God nudges your heart to let go of something valuable in your life, how do you let go when there is no sure replacement?</span> </div>
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It's a hard question. I'm normally so reluctant to let go and let things change. The unknown stresses me out, as I'm sure it does most of you. What is it specifically for you? For me, lately, it has been letting go of a safety blanket (so to speak), and loosening my rigid grip I had on a friendship for so long. Not that it's gone, but it's certainly not so present in my life. And that is terrifying. It's a change, and I don't do so well with stress. Think about this. If you knew, in your heart, that God wanted you to leave the wonderful job you had and go do something else, but you had no other job lined up, would you willingly give up that original job? That's a hard decision. I mean, there is no sure replacement. There's no guarantee you're going to have a replacement job right away. So, you quit your job and now you're sitting at home with no place to go to for work. Sure, you may be out searching for one, but how do you fill that gap? Too often we try to replace that kind of loss with things other than God. I am so guilty of this. <br />
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Combining these feelings with everything I've heard over the past couple of weeks, I've had more motivation lately to spend time with God. I know, that sounds awful. I should be doing that anyway, right? But I'm usually so caught up in what I have to do that day, what I need to do to survive the next day, who I'm going to see the next day, wondering how my thesis is <em>ever</em> going to get done. Lately I've just been trying to rest in Christ. Decisions He lays before us are not always easy. And when that decision means letting go of something that you perceived so valuable in your life, it's a very difficult one. I've always been one to only make a decision when I'm fully informed of the pros and cons of the situation and I've had ample time to ponder the consequences. But sometimes, the end result isn't set in stone. Sometimes you just have to give something up, trusting in God's nudges, and rely on the fact that your mind can't possibly know the intricate weaving of God's plan. I'm trying to put myself back in the spot of relying on my trust for God instead of relying on something that is familiar to me. My faith in God's timing is the replacement I've been looking for. And the cool thing is that I don't have to wonder when that's going to show up in my life. It has always been there, whether I've felt it or not.<br />
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<em><strong><span style="color: #38761d;">"However, as it is written: </span></strong></em><br />
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<em><strong><span style="color: #38761d;">'No eye has seen, no ear has hears, no mind has conceived what </span></strong></em></div>
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<em><strong><span style="color: #38761d;">God has prepared form those who love him--'</span></strong></em></div>
<em><strong><span style="color: #38761d;">but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the man's spirit within him? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God."</span></strong></em><br />
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<em><strong><span style="color: #38761d;">-1 Corinthians 2:9-11</span></strong></em></div>
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<strong><em><span style="color: #38761d;">"For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."</span></em></strong></div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-87466069369300411422015-01-14T10:13:00.003-06:002015-01-14T10:13:42.073-06:00The FishbowlOh boy. Life. <br />
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It just seems to keep coming around every corner. I do apologize for not blogging for the last couple of months. I've fallen off the blogging wagon for a bit. But, I'm hoping to get back to it as much as I can. You know, starting my last semester at TCU this week has gotten me thinking. I've been through the book of James a lot, whether it was through a bible study, or in church. There is always something new to find in James. <br />
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<em><strong><span style="font-size: large;">"Now listen, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.' Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, 'If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that.' As it is, you boast and brag. All such boasting is evil. Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins."</span></strong></em></div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;">-James 4:13-17</span></strong></div>
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This passage seems quite relevant to my life lately. I'm a graduating senior, I'm going to have to find a job, I have to pass the NCLEX...I could go on. We all have plans of what we're doing. I, for one, have a tentative plan right now. We have a plan for everything in our life whether that be related to relationships, school, career plan, siblings, marriage, kids. There are also more serious thoughts such as we plan to outlive our parents or that we plan to not ever have cancer. It's a never-ending cycle. Sometimes those plans are interrupted. It's funny, I read the above passage in my bible and below the chapter I had written <span style="font-size: x-large;">"thinking <em>your</em> plan is <em>God's</em> plan is wrong".</span> How many times do we assume that our plan is God's plan? Well, God wants the best for me, this is what I want to do, of course He's going to help make it happen. I just hope it's in His plan. I hope He goes along with it. The frustration comes along when our plan doesn't work out and then the confusion starts. I do this all the time. For example, after graduation I want to go back to Colorado. I eventually want to end up working with children and their families who deal with Type 1 Diabetes as a nurse practitioner. That's in my plan. I sure do hope that's in God's plan as well. Nothing has pointed me towards "no" in the past year. But I don't know if that's going to change at the last minute. I can plan and strategize all I want, but the fact is, I don't know what God has planned for my future. All I know is that God gave me Type 1 Diabetes for a reason. God put me into nursing for a reason. Hopefully he has me pass the NCLEX the first time around for a reason. Haha okay, well, that's MY hope. It's almost like we are in our own little fishbowl of a world planning away when there are endless possibilities outside of that bowl. Anyway, this all leads into saying that God will provide. That's hard to remember when things don't go "according to plan". Or, when things don't go according to OUR plan. God doesn't make wrong moves. I'm going to try and remember that concept as my senior year progresses into its last semester. Thanks for reading!</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-91403795088405059522014-10-28T16:22:00.001-05:002014-10-28T16:22:21.082-05:00In The News
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<a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/news/ebola-inside-the-first-united-states-diagnosis-thomas-eric-duncan/" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Treating Ebola: Inside the First U.S. Diagnosis</span></a></h2>
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Please take a moment and click on the link above. It will take you to a 16 minute video that was part of an episode of 60 Minutes on CBS. The video is an interview with the nurses involved in Eric Duncan's care - the first person to die of Ebola. With Ebola everywhere in the news, I just wanted to get this video out there and publicize what nurses actually do. </div>
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I loved this video. We watched it in one of my classes today. It just really shows how people are dealing with this Ebola crisis, and it talks about the people behind the care. Nurses are the ones ultimately caring for patients. Nurses are the ones who are patients' last line of defense against all sorts of complications. </div>
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This reminds me why I am in nursing school. It reminds me why I even chose to go into nursing school. It keeps this job in perspective. I believed I could make a difference when I chose to go into nursing school. I believe I can make a difference now and in the future for patients. Many people don't think of nursing as a dangerous profession, but nurses risk their lives and health every day in caring for patients. Our health care system has its faults, but healthcare professionals are not one of them. There are good people working within our healthcare system - doctors and nurses alike. I care about people and their well-being. When patients are faced with terrifying diagnoses, faced with losing a loved one, with losing their health status, they need to turn to someone. That person is often the nurse. </div>
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I am writing this post only to comment on the bravery of these nurses. I can only hope if something else like this happens in the future when I'm in the field, I only hope I have this kind of courage and strength. Also, read all of the bible verse below. I encourage you to look up the verse and read 1 Corinthians 12: 4-11.<br />
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<em><strong>"There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but the same God works all of them in all men. Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one there is given through the Spirit the message of wisdom, to another the message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit..."<br />1 Corinthians 12:4-9</strong></em></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-36186272276346966282014-09-19T10:58:00.002-05:002014-09-19T10:58:50.604-05:00Responding With Sarcasm: Diabetes Edition<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Tell me, what was your impression after reading the above pictures? Let me tell you how I felt. I felt embarrassed. Embarrassed for myself and embarrassed for the type 1 diabetes community. I found all of these pictures on pinterest, out there for everyone to see. Some of the basic concepts behind these pictures, I agree with. I mean, a dental hygienist did tell me recently that his cat had type 1 diabetes. Obviously, he knew what I went through every day. Which, he doesn't. To tell the truth, you usually don't know what a type 1 diabetic goes through every day unless you are one or are very close to someone who is. But, let me get to my point here...</div>
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You ask why these pictures create a sense of embarrassment in me. It's because I think they're incredibly mean! I think they are uncalled for. They demoralize people who do not have diabetes and only want to learn more about it, or are only trying their best to help. The meme about ALS also makes me mad. Type 1 diabetes is an awful disease. I'm not saying it's not, but ALS is also a very awful, debilitating disease. With ALS, there is gradual destruction of nerve cells that control motor movement. Eventually, the person can't move, but is still cognitively intact. In some ways, it is worse than type 1 diabetes. The sense of entitlement to the statement in that picture blows me away. I participated in the ALS ice bucket challenge, and I would do it over and over again. They deserve awareness just as much as the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation deserves awareness.</div>
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This is the way I look at it. I always have people asking me questions about my diabetes, people trying to relate to me when I tell them I have diabetes, people trying to make it better. I appreciate those efforts, even if they aren't on the right track. Maybe it's because I'm almost a nurse, but I take those opportunities and turn them into teaching moments. I turn them into moments where I can teach somebody about the nature of my disease instead of making fun of them for trying to understand it. They are only people who are trying to reach out to me in an impossible situation. I mean, how do you make a chronic disease better? I don't look down on people trying to learn. I don't look down on people who are only trying to help.</div>
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Now, I understand the frustration behind these pictures. Believe me, I do. And I assume that making these "funny" pictures are a way of coping with the societal implications of having diabetes. But, being sarcastic to the person whose educational level on diabetes isn't quite on the level of yours? Absolutely not. They don't live with the disease, they don't know. This society is very focused on type 2 diabetes, which is fine! Type 2 diabetics are still dealing with a disease and there is so much information out there about it. People often default to thinking I have type 2. But there are no excuses to make fun of people who only need some education about the differences. </div>
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This is my rant about these pictures on pinterest. I know this doesn't apply to most of you, but I just wanted to get it out there. Be careful about replying with sarcasm to people who truly are only trying to help and understand. Take the opportunity to educate people. And keep me accountable! I don't want to become a diabetic who responds with sarcasm and bitterness. I often respond in laughter because after having diabetes all these years, I have to find humor in the everyday struggle. I laughed about that dental hygienist comparing me to his cat, after I left, of course. But that is very different than responding with sarcasm. There's nothing I love more than being able to share my struggle with diabetes with someone else and how God has been there the whole time to pull me out of those dark places. God keeps me going. Thanks for reading!</div>
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<em>"Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us."</em></div>
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<em>-Romans 5:3-5</em></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-19687675739931049932014-09-04T12:12:00.005-05:002014-09-05T09:58:54.719-05:00Returning the FavorSo, this subject just kind of came on my mind this morning. And, I must say, it is frustrating. I see it and hear it every day; some days it frustrates me, some days I go right along with it. <br />
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We are so inundated by making ourselves happy in this world. And, I don't mean following your dream or anything like that. That's great. I'm talking about our relationships with people. I read a quote by Meryl Streep on facebook that somebody shared that frustrated me a little bit. Don't get me wrong, I love Meryl Streep, she's one of my favorite actresses, but think to yourself...see how many quotes you have read that sound like this:<br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;">I'm not going to be patient with people who aren't patient with me.</span></strong></div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;">I'm not going to do things that make me unhappy.</span></strong></div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;">I'm not going to give the time of day to people who don't give me the time of day.</span></strong></div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;">I'm not going to love people who don't take the time to love me.</span></strong></div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: large;">Life is short, I should not have to deal with people who are mean to me.</span></strong></div>
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All of these statements are looking out for one thing: <strong><span style="font-size: x-large;">ME</span></strong>. <br />
These ideals have been born out of American idealism and self promotion. I don't know if these statements ever strike you as self-indulging. They do for me. If you take a minute to think about these statements, you have to take a minute and think about the person on the other side of that. Sure, I agree that spending time with people who are mean or who are bad influences isn't probably the smartest plan, but not associating with those people at all? Chances are, they need someone to talk to. Chances are, they've had it rough. Now, we've all had it rough, but nobody copes in the exact same way. Bullying is awful. But the bullies you hear about usually have a rough home life, or they're acting out because a family member just died. I'm not condoning their actions. They are wrong, and they really don't have an excuse, but some just need a person to hold them accountable, to love them through it. Those people that "don't deserve your time" probably need someone more than ever. As Christians, I feel as though we should set the example and take the time to love those who don't love us. We should take the time to "deal" with people who aren't the nicest. We should be patient with those who don't return the favor. It's all one big cycle and sometimes you can change a person's life by being present. It is just something to consider in a world where self promotion and self indulgence is an everyday presence.<br />
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Obviously, every person is a different case. But, I'm just telling you to take these statements with a grain of salt. Some people, no matter how hard you try, just aren't going to be ready to listen to you. Those people may need some time, but that doesn't mean you drop them completely and no longer give them the time of day. For your own sake, sometimes you need to take a break from those people, but telling them <em>they're not deserving</em> of your love, time, or energy? Maybe not, but let's not forget... technically we aren't worth God's love, time, or energy. That's what redemption is for. And that's why we need to be grateful for Him giving us those blessings every day. It's hard to reciprocate good things to people who treat us badly. I know, I struggle with it too. I also have to improve on it. I have this attitude without even realizing it at times. Take a moment out of your day and read the bible verse below. I read it and had to include it as it speaks exactly to this issue. <br />
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<strong><em>"</em>If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full.<em> But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful."</em></strong></div>
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<strong>-Luke 6:32-36</strong></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-54862635953620764082014-07-10T10:59:00.001-05:002014-07-10T13:48:53.436-05:00Controversy For The Day<a href="http://elitedaily.com/dating/11-ways-relationship-isnt-actually-holding-back-anything/654586/">http://elitedaily.com/dating/11-ways-relationship-isnt-actually-holding-back-anything/654586/</a><br />
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The link above is something I saw on facebook yesterday. It is called "11 Reasons Why Your Relationship Isn't Actually Holding You Back". I must tell you, the #8 reason actually made me a little bit angry. Here is one of their reasons why your relationship isn't holding you back: <br />
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<em><span style="font-size: large;">#8. You have consistent, meaningful sex with someone you care about (and who cares about you)</span></em></h4>
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Great. First of all, I was surprised to see that this had its own number in the list. This #8 implies that if you are in a long-term relationship, you should be having sex. It implies that sex is expected in a relationship. This ideal is also present in almost every movie out there, every magazine, etc...this "meaningful sex" is what people want in a dating relationship. Well, let me tell you one thing. I don't believe it for a second. In fact, I would argue the opposite. Sex does not have to be part of a long term relationship. Physical attraction, yes. Sex, no. It is incredibly sad that "dating" in this world includes the expectation of having sex with the person. Our society is inundated by this ideal. Think about it. We are raising young girls in this sort of culture. Out society is raising young people to believe that this is expected. Whether or not parents reinforce that does not erase the fact that society is filled with it.There is absolutely no reason to have sex with someone just because you are dating him/her. It is not required; it should not be <em>expected</em>. There is no point in which, after dating for a certain amount of time, you must have sex. <br />
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Side note...marriage is different, and that's not what I'm talking about in this post. This post is not meant to pass judgment on people. I am not trying to say that these people are awful and immoral. Far be it from me to judge behavior. I am merely commenting on the fact that sex in relationships now seems to be expected.<br />
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Standards of morality adjust with the times. Elvis Presley and his music used to be unwelcome among society. Now, he's a classic. The Rolling Stones used to be unwelcome. Now, they're a classic band. Ideals of sexual morality have evolved with time. Everyone has different thoughts about this matter. Religion, upbringing, and education all influence views on this concept. I just want to put out there that I don't think sex should be considered in this way. Granted, my religion and morals are influencing what I'm saying here, but I just want to say to the girls out there - you do not have to sleep with the guy you are dating if you do not want to. If that is a deal breaker for him, then he isn't the right guy for you. For the guys out there - you sometimes feel as much pressure as the girls to have sex, probably even more. You don't have to have sex either. You shouldn't expect it from a girl and you shouldn't expect it from yourself, if you don't want to. <br />
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I realize that this post may be a bit controversial. This is not meant to judge anyone, but to only comment on the ideals of the "dating world". We are in charge of our own choices whether we are guided by religion, education, or upbringing. God gives us free will, but the original purpose of dating is to see what kind of man or woman you want to marry. The purpose of dating is to find satisfaction in the other's values, in their love, and their security. Sex taints a lot of things when you're dating. It makes everything more complicated. So, the point of my post is getting the thought out there that sex should not be<em> expected</em> from the guy or the girl when dating even if our society implies so. And, if you don't want that in your relationship, it is okay. However, we all know that you can't go wrong with a bit of romance! Thanks for reading.<br />
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<em>"Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies."</em></div>
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<em>-1 Corinthians 6:18-20</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-6221904389664416662014-07-08T11:20:00.000-05:002014-07-08T11:20:39.893-05:00People Are ImportantSo, last week, I had an appointment with a new endocrinologist. I haven't really had one since I've moved to Texas, and it was time to get one. To preface this, I always dread my endocrinology appointments. I have to mentally prepare myself to receive many things: disapproving looks, difficult questions, judgment, etc. I don't complain much about my diabetes, it is just a part of my daily life, but these appointments usually bring up unpleasant realities that I normally try and forget. These appointments were not always like that. My doctor, back home in Colorado, truly got to know me as a person and was adamant about not letting type 1 diabetes rule my life. I didn't realize how much he truly cared about me, the patient, not my levels. He cared about my levels, but he also cared about the cause of them being high or low. My A1c's have been pretty high the last few years. The higher those go, the more potential damage is being done to my body. Last year my A1c was a 9.0%, considerably better than it had been the last few years. You can imagine my relief, right? I was finally going in the correct direction. That leads me to last week...<br />
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Well, my appointment happened last week and when this new doctor asked me what my last A1c was, he was shocked. He proceeded to ask me why I hadn't been taking better care of myself. He reminded me that I should know that is not a good A1c, I was in nursing school. He didn't ask me my diabetic history, he didn't ask me if there was a reason it had been higher, he didn't ask me what it was like to deal with type 1 diabetes every single day. He only saw that my A1c of 9.0% was high. I wouldn't be surprised if he labeled me as "noncompliant" in my medical record. He proceeded to tell me his plan of action while I sat there trying not to cry in front of my new doctor after hearing that I was a failure. If he had given me a chance to explain I'd have told him that these last few years have been incredibly hard on me and my family and that I was sorry that my diabetes had possibly taken a backseat to all of the stress and pressure. I've had diabetes for 19 years, I can't have it perfect every time. But, my doctor's plan of action? Me testing my blood sugar 7 times a day, putting me on a sensor for 3 days next week (which is inserted with a needle and attaches to your skin), attending a class that I don't need about my pump, and stopping my life to take care of it all. And he didn't even ask me what I thought about it.<br />
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Out of all this, I just want to make the point that <strong><em>people</em></strong> are important. My doctor from back home always treated me as a person with a life, a person with the same stresses as everyone else but also dealing with a disease. This appointment made me feel small and insignificant as one never had before. He practically accused me of purposely not taking adequate care of myself. I'm sorry, but taking care of diabetes is much different than the things your read in medical textbooks. I would know. My point is that we need to treat people as people. That may sound like a simple thing, but for me in that doctor's office, I did not feel like a person. I felt labeled; I felt like a diabetic who couldn't do anything right. I'm sure he means well and that he is a good doctor, but please, treat me as a real person. This concept goes for anything in life. Before we sit there and pass judgment, or before we label somebody with a certain title, think about them as a person. What is their history? What has been going on in their life? Do they need somebody to talk to? Do they need a hug? Think about how you treat people. Think about the assumptions you make and think of the effect that those assumptions may have.<br />
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Lastly, I would like to ask you guys for prayer for all this going on. Frankly, it is very frustrating and difficult for me. I don't expect anyone to understand what it is like, and I certainly hope you never do. I would never wish that on anyone. For me it can't just go away. It's there whether I like it or not and I don't want to make a big deal out of it. Sometimes, though, it takes everything I have to not give up. This new treatment plan doesn't exactly bring me any joy. I need patience, willingness, and strength. And only that I can get from Christ because I feel as if I have run out of those for this situation. Thanks for reading and thank you for your prayers! <br />
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<em>"Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others."</em></div>
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<em>-Philippians 2:1-4</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-45011979653296133652014-04-21T13:58:00.002-05:002014-04-21T14:06:40.961-05:00Confessions of a Grateful HeartAlas, I have waited more than a month to write another blog post. I do apologize. This year has been absolutely crazy. 17 hours and clinicals does not make for a very open schedule! This last semester has been a struggle. I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to just give up because I have been overloaded emotionally. It has been very difficult.<br />
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I don't even know where to begin, I don't have a structured layout to this blog post. But, who cares. Sometimes you just have to write. Lately, despite everything going on, I've just felt so much love for people. I've seen God at work in many lives recently, including my own. I've seen it through my crazy, emotional semester with my family and those who are close to me. I don't think I've ever felt God's mission to love people more than I have this semester. Almost every message I've heard lately has to do with how much God loves me and how blessed I am to receive such grace every day. As long as I have that behind me, I have a need to love other people. Have you ever felt that urgency in your life? <br />
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Another thing: have you ever just sat down and appreciated the people in your life? We are so wrapped up in our lives that we forget God has placed certain people there at just the right time to get us through. God has sent me little reminders along the way that there are so many good people right in front of me. I've felt this especially right after this Easter weekend. I spent it with Phil's very wonderful family. Heck, they're probably reading this, but it doesn't matter, because they should hear it :). Honestly, it is a good reminder for me that there are wholesome families out there who are together and who make the choice to love each other every single day. Phil has been instrumental in supporting me mentally and keeping my vigor for life alive and thriving. For example: I'm not going to lie, having a parent in one state and one in a different state is certainly a weird feeling and I feel disconnected from my dad a lot. Being in a relationship for over two years with Phil has finally helped me break through some of that hurt. I always told myself, "I don't have 'daddy' issues. That's ridiculous, I'm totally fine. I don't act out and I'm on a good path in life. I was grown-up enough when it all went down." I made mistakes in our relationship and constantly asked myself, "Why do I keep going there? Why do I struggle so much? Why am I seeking security in all the wrong ways when I know better?" It was very frustrating until the reason finally dawned on me one night, quite suddenly, I might add. I finally admitted that I was hurt by my dad and it affected me more than I ever let on. It also manifested in different ways. I told myself for so long that I had put the situation behind me and I had forgiven my dad, so it should be over that I started to believe it. Then I became frustrated when it broke through again. I can only be thankful that God put me in the path of a guy with character, who loves God, who took it all in stride with me, and who didn't take advantage of it. And I am thankful for the people who raised him to be that way. When I met Phil freshman year, I had no idea how large a role he would have in my life as I walked through my emotions. For all my disheartening moments, there has been someone there to love me through it.<br />
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Don't get me wrong, I love my entire family and they've always been there for me, just in different ways. People in my family also serve as reminders of wholesome families. My mom is a wonderful woman and I'm so thankful I have her here, and we've been able to walk through the past couple years together, which have been hard ones. She's been through many life trials and I take her advice quite willingly because I definitely don't know everything (I know, that may surprise some of you haha). Also, I've thought a lot about my adoption story lately. It is such a positive thing and I know God blessed me with a wonderful childhood, but I haven't forgotten where I come from. My blood relatives, my adoptive relatives, they're all family and spread out everywhere. I am so thankful I have them in my life.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiQeS1nplSmTMZLB4DH13uvgz_wYZ577pj8k1Sn73niUVZPodsP91dx4sKCTkZm37VPnC3F7nrcHz48YxzpRYm-ytoFp6QqkkhLvDzh2zG1GZ2arTzMJQFncWUMDYSj14zGEDyEmlH5ayc/s1600/e26b476d290fb054aa5225ef3e3f582b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiQeS1nplSmTMZLB4DH13uvgz_wYZ577pj8k1Sn73niUVZPodsP91dx4sKCTkZm37VPnC3F7nrcHz48YxzpRYm-ytoFp6QqkkhLvDzh2zG1GZ2arTzMJQFncWUMDYSj14zGEDyEmlH5ayc/s1600/e26b476d290fb054aa5225ef3e3f582b.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a>All these things make me who I am today. God has kept me on the path I needed to be on, but I've received help from certain people. They have kept me straight and given me reminders that God has a plan for me and I can't give up. I've been so grateful and I can't help but want to love other people back. After Easter Sunday, I can only express gratitude and praise that through all my weaknesses, I will always have the love I need and a God who understands human suffering, who will never forsake me. Hindsight is always 20/20, right? Well, when I look back on my life, all the difficult things I've gone through have been filled with blessings to get me through. So, when I'm emotionally spent and exhausted, God will continually fill me up and bring me down the path He always intended for me to go. And He will for you too. Thanks for reading.<br />
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<em><strong>"But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."</strong></em></div>
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<em><strong>-2 Corinthians 12:9-10</strong></em></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-19638756204279754112014-03-12T22:04:00.001-05:002014-03-12T22:05:42.365-05:00Momentary ReprieveWas my last post truly on February 10th? Wow. As I sit here, pondering why on earth I have waited so long to write another blog post, the only thing I can come up with is that I haven't felt inspired lately. My heart hasn't felt uplifted. There has been so much going on in my head and in my life - I just haven't had the energy to write a blog post.<br />
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Well, as I sit here writing this, in my TCU nursing sweatshirt, hair still wet from a swim at the gym (haha that rhymes), I am eager to finally write another blog post. It was so odd, it came to me in the car on the way home from Lifetime Fitness. I just swam a few thousand yards, and like I always do after I swim, I felt satisfied that I went...even if it was at 8:00 at night. In the car I switch through the pre-set channels and wonder if I feel like listening to country music or if I feel like listening to Christian music. I settle on Christian music. It was odd, after a moment, barely even listening to the music, I felt happy. If I'm going to be honest with you, I haven't really felt that way recently. I've felt bogged down, worried, tired, worn out. But, in the car just now I felt lighter.<br />
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The weird thing is, nothing has particularly changed in my life since when I left for the gym. It was just like a momentary reprieve of everything that has been going on in my head. Something lifted from my heart. It was just a few moments, but I just felt that God has everything right where He wants it. He has me right where He wants me, and He knows exactly how I've been feeling and exactly what my life is right now. Funny thing, He always knows exactly what my life is at any given moment; I seem to forget that time and time again. But, in the car, it was almost like a reminder, that God brings me through everything I don't think I can handle or deal with. He's got this, I don't. Worry is one of my worst enemies and it gets me every single time. I am so incredibly susceptible to worrying about everything. That momentary reprieve in my car just felt like a wonderful reminder and I felt happier than I have been feeling. Not that I've been depressed, but I've been wondering what God's trying to teach me, what He's trying to lead me through lately. And, I don't have it figured out, unfortunately. But, I'm just saying, the little reprieve in the car was a nice reminder. I couldn't help but start praying and thanking God for what He's given me, what He's gotten me through in the past, and thanking Him for always being in control. I wish the moment had lasted longer. Anyway, I hope all of you are having a wonderful spring break! Hopefully, next time, my next post won't be so far away from this one!<br />
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<em>"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."</em></div>
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<em>-Matthew 6:33-34</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-46315778233253261002014-02-10T14:45:00.003-06:002014-02-10T14:45:13.181-06:00I Can't Handle It<div align="center">
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This is something I hear all the time. People have said it to me...and for some reason it has always rubbed me the wrong way. Well, I heard something in church the other day and it brought me such a sense of relief...<br />
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My life has been filled with a lot of things that "I can't deal with". Dealing with Type 1 Diabetes every day. Sticking myself with needles every day. My swimming career just ending one day. The harrowing decision of where to attend college. My parents getting a divorce. You may hear those things and say, okay, Morgan, I've been through so much worse. Well, I bet you have. I don't doubt that I've had it wonderful compared to many of you. Everybody's breaking point is different. But it doesn't change the fact that when I heard that phrase, I felt slightly better because it basically said that I could handle it, and God knew I could. Have we ever stopped to think about how ridiculous that is? We fool ourselves into thinking we can handle our lives. Haha, let's be real...we can't handle anything. <br />
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It is ridiculous that we think God gives us stuff to deal with because "we can handle it". No, we can't. I know I can't. Haha, sometimes I imagine Him up there grinning down at us in love saying, "That's cute." I have felt overwhelmed in life and just thought "Man, I would not have gotten through that if I hadn't turned to God." I'm sure some of us realize this, and some of us don't. But the statement above is false. And we need to recognize it as false. God gives us more than we can handle so we can turn to Him. There is nothing God can't handle. I think it is important to grasp the concept that we are not strong enough to get through life on our own. It is important to grasp the concept that even though we have Christ in our lives, we cannot get through life on our own. God gets us through. I know He has gotten me through. I haven't coped with trials in life <em>on my own</em>. God has always been the one to pull me through when I thought I couldn't handle it. <br />
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So, God does give you trials you can't handle. He knows we can't handle it. But He knows <em>He</em> can handle it. He also knows we will get through when we allow God to lead us through it. <br />
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<em>"...All men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field. The grass withers and the flowers fall, because the breath of the Lord blows on them. Surely the people are grass. The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever."</em></div>
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<em>-Isaiah 40:6-8</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-43024071309547534052014-01-21T14:17:00.000-06:002014-01-21T14:18:30.900-06:00Awfully Overwhelming<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="color: magenta; font-size: x-large;"><strong>Overwhelmed</strong></span></div>
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<span style="color: magenta;"><span style="font-size: large;">A mixture of depression and stress. You feel like you </span><span style="font-size: large;">want </span></span></div>
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I know I am not alone in feeling overwhelmed recently. The first week of school just ended. Of course you're feeling overwhelmed. Each of your teachers handed you a syllabus and said, "Here is what YOU have to do this semester!" Oh, great. Some of you are taking 13 hours, some 18, but I think it's safe to say the first week of school is always overwhelming. To tell you the truth, I have felt quite overwhelmed. And it didn't just start last week. Maybe some of you have family things going on. Maybe some of you have friendships that are on the rocks. Maybe some of you are dreading being back on campus with that one roommate who never cleans. I don't know, but chances are, you've got a lot on your plate. <br />
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I must confess something related to going to Colorado the last week of Christmas break. Of course, I was happy as can be while I was there. I saw old friends, I re-visited old stomping grounds, and I had my favorite guy there to do it all with me. However, after I got back, I immediately started feeling overwhelmed. Little things were annoying me that normally wouldn't have. If any of you know me, you know I worry more than is probably good for my health. Anyway, I started worrying and thinking too much and I was just unhappy. I thought maybe I was PMSing; if I was honest with myself, though, I knew I wasn't. Despite my efforts to appear normal, I couldn't hide it. Maybe it was because I was not in Colorado anymore, maybe it was the intimidating start of a new semester, maybe I was just overwhelmed with everything happening all at once. And, I must admit, it had been going on through last week... quite possibly a little bit this week as well. When I feel overwhelmed for a long while, I start getting unfriendly, and I'm not that kind of person. So, you can imagine me wanting to fix it.<br />
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So. What do I do with that? What do <em>we</em> do with that? I can tell you to lift it up in prayer until I am blue in the face. But, the truth is, I'm not the best at that myself. I can pray, and praying is always good, but I find that I worry anyway. And it is completely draining to worry. I find myself tired of everything already at about 7:00pm. Well, if you're anything like me, something I say here won't necessarily make you feel better. So, I'm going to list some Scripture that may be helpful to you. And not just those verses you always hear when you're stressed (even though those are still good), but scripture that I hope will actually bring you some relief. Sometimes I need more than just a kind word to relieve emotional stress. I need some sort of power behind it. The Bible can give that to you. Some of these verses may have some history behind them that I'm not completely aware of, but I think no matter the circumstance in which these words were written, we can all learn from it. And, if you need anyone to talk to, find someone you trust to talk it all out. That can always lift some heavy weights off as well. I hope you start to feel a little lighter this week. :)<br />
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. G=Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. All of us who are mature should take such a view of things..."</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>-Philippians 3:12-15</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>"Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident."</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>-Psalm 27:3</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>"All my longings lie open before you, O Lord; my sighing is not hidden from you."</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>-Psalm 38:9</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you...And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>-2 Peter 5:6-7,10</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows."</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><strong>-Matthew 10:29-31</strong></span></em></div>
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*courtesy of <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/">www.urbandictionary.com</a></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-12968890840402648042013-12-16T15:27:00.000-06:002013-12-16T15:27:16.668-06:00Warrior Strong<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Like any normal day, I got on facebook and noticed that someone who had graduated a couple years before me in high school had posted something that had the headline BREAKING NEWS. I glanced at it, then read a little further. There was another school shooting in Colorado?! Reading further to see who was affected, I will never forget that feeling of reading the name of my school: Arapahoe High School. My heart stopped and I frantically clicked on the link to read what was going on. There had been no news. Quickly, I shared the picture and asked for immediate prayers as my mind began praying incessantly. It was unreal. I kept up with the developing story for hours, and I couldn't think of anything else. Names flashed through my head of people I knew at Arapahoe, the faculty, and those of my classmates who had younger siblings at Arapahoe. It was at that moment that I wanted to be back home in Colorado so badly with my warrior family and I knew the only thing I could do here was pray and ask for prayers.<br />
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Wow, it's so terrifying when something so awful hits home. It didn't hit close to home, it hit home. My heart continues to break for those who endured that day of terror. I was watching the live video and as the story continued, I saw students being reunited with their parents, scared to death. It brought tears to my eyes. I just could not, and still cannot, imagine what was going through the heads of the students that day. The fear and terror is unimaginable. As the students were evacuated and there was report that the school was secure, I began thinking of my own 4 years at Arapahoe. That school has been such a part of me and I'm always proud to say that I was a Warrior. I look back with fond memories of high school: the friends I made, the teachers I had, swimming with Richmond all four years with the Lady Water Warriors. You never think something so awful will happen to a place that is so close to your heart. My school was so brave that day, you all continue to be brave, and I hope you all know how many prayers are being sent your way. <br />
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This has had psychological ramifications on me, and I graduated in 2011 and I'm all the way in Texas. My heart, though, is always in Colorado and I am a proud Colorado girl. Furthermore, I am a proud Arapahoe Warrior. So, here is a message to all you warriors out there: We are a close knit community and we will always take care of one another. If any of you need to talk, need to process, do not hesitate to ask for help. Arapahoe has an outstanding faculty and outstanding students. We will get through this. I was blown away by the support that poured out just over facebook on that day with generations of warriors coming together as one strong community. Prayers are being said for Claire and for the families of Arapahoe High School. God has everything in the palm of His hands and He will take care of you. Do not give up; Warriors, always take care of one another.<br />
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<em>"See, the Sovereign Lord comes with power, and he rules with a mighty arm. See, his reward is with him, and his recompense accompanies him. He tends his flock like a shepherd; He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young."</em></div>
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<em>-Isaiah 40:10-11</em></div>
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<em>"He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."</em></div>
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<em>-Isaiah 40:29-31</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-90556393853901589322013-12-10T16:20:00.001-06:002013-12-10T16:20:22.198-06:00Are You Willing?So, over Thanksgiving break, something happened that I've never really seen before. I was sitting at Starbucks with my mom, enjoying my holiday drink, when I overheard some men talking at the table next to me. There were four of them, two on each side of the table, and I noticed that three of them were listening to one of the guys talk. I didn't hear the majority of the conversation, but I heard some things like "Jesus loves you so much" and "He would do that for us". I noticed one of the guys seemed to be listening very intently. I couldn't help but infer that the Gospel was being shared. It made my heart happy and, you know, that's not something you see/hear every day in our society...<br />
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I heard something the other day that I had never really thought about before. Let me preface this by saying that many people are out there who choose not to believe in Christ. There are those out there that think there is something, they just don't know what/who. There are people out there who say they follow Christ. And there are people out there that actively follow Him.<br />
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The whole thing about Jesus speaking in parables in the Bible seems to be this: that He tells those stories so that only people who are willing to hear Him will understand the message. To everyone else, it just seems like a pointless story. But those who are willing to hear get something out of the "moral of the story" so to speak. Isn't that interesting? Think about it. Only if you're willing to really listen and hear will you understand the message. If you're heart is open to hearing about Christ, if your heart is willing to accept that He is that "something more", you will hear what He has to say. After telling the parable about the sower and the seed (Mark 4:4-9), Jesus says, "Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear." Anyone could have just heard that parable, but Jesus was speaking to those who would hear His message. You can hear the words and just let it go in one ear and out the other, but those who open their ears to Him will hear what the 'moral of the story' is. It may take some practice, sometimes I miss points. However, the fact of the matter is there. You need to hear it in order to feel it, in order to live it. <br />
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As a believer, I never really thought about it that way. I've always been to church and I've listened to the messages and tried to take them to heart. This is going to be a relatively short post, but vital to people out there. If people are asking questions, answer them, don't let them wander on their own. You can't change their heart, but if they are becoming inclined to seek Christ, then walk with them. <br />
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<em><strong><span style="color: #3d85c6;">"'Listen! A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants, so that they did not bear grain. Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up, grew and produced a crop, some multiplying thirty, some sixty, some a hundred times.' Then Jesus said, 'Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.'"</span></strong></em></div>
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<em><strong><span style="color: #3d85c6;">-Mark 4:3-9</span></strong></em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-70142119988185938212013-11-26T14:35:00.002-06:002013-11-26T14:35:50.626-06:00The Month of NovemberThis month of November has a particular significance for me and my life. Two major life events being celebrated/advertised are diabetes and adoption. No doubt you know this from my numerous facebook posts. I'd like to talk about them and how they've impacted my life.<br />
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I know last year I did a mini-blog series on having Type 1 Diabetes. Please feel free to go back and read those! I've had diabetes for 18 years. 18 years. People with diabetes before insulin would survive maybe 3 days at the most. Insulin was discovered in 1922, so 71 years before I was born. Anyway, that's just amazing. I've been so blessed by modern technology and that I've been able to live healthily for 18 years. God has blessed me throughout my life. I have parents who monitored my every move when I was little, who got up in the middle of the night to test my blood sugar, who sacrificed their sleep to get me juice when I was low in the middle of the night, who taught me moderation, who taught me to be strong, who took on every challenge with courage. I could go on. I still remember my mom talking to me one night - I had been crying because I was upset and tired of doing my "diabetes" thing every day. She didn't sit there and tell me to "suck it up" because I would be dealing with it for the rest of my life. After all she had been through and done for me, she sat there, hugged me, and just said "I'm so sorry. I can't imagine what it's like." I mean, gosh, talk about a supportive parent. She did know what it was like. She did that for years before I could do it all for myself. I still ask her for help sometimes. I have been so blessed to live in a family and a time where I can get the things I need to survive. For those of you who know me, I hope you now realize how serious diabetes is. I often make jokes and make light of the subject with you because I can't let it rule my life and keep me from doing things I want to do. But, behind those jokes is often a very serious consequence. And I know that. I'm blessed I had doctors who taught me how to handle my disease and help teach me how to be independent. I'm blessed my doctor pushed me to get an insulin pump (I was not fond of the idea in the beginning). I'm blessed with the means to take care of myself. So many do not have that luxury. I take care of myself because my health is worth it. There is too much I want to do in life; I can't allow my health to inhibit me. <br />
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Adoption. It's quite a thing. It's odd, I've never not felt a part of my adopted family. But the fact remains, that I have another family. My blood family. Just last year I discovered I had another brother. I have another sister. I have other brothers. I have different grandparents. I've never met my biological father, which is odd, I suppose. The woman who brought me into this world has passed. Adoption hasn't necessarily changed me as a person, but it just means I have many people who are dear to me, whether they be from my blood family or my adoptive family. When I go to the doctor and they ask me my family history, I can only tell them a few things. However, adoption hasn't affected my life like it has some children. I'm blessed by that, but I do still belong in that "adopted" category. It's a cool thing to be adopted. There are some days where I do wish I had known my birth mom better or remembered her well. During Christmas back in Colorado, I would sit on the couch next to our tree, with the tree lights on and the lights dimmed and think about Michelle for a minute. I know it sounds weird. But, during Christmas, it's only natural to think about family; so I did. One thing I have realized through my adoptive family is that I am very blessed to have parents who brought me up in a supportive environment. Knowing that God has taken care of me and provided for me throughout my life makes me so thankful. And that's what I've been thinking about going into the Thanksgiving holiday. One little thing could've changed everything.<br />
My mom told me my adoption story one day. God is amazing. My mom and dad thought they were going to adopt a little boy at first. Then that fell through and God just placed Michelle and her family into the hands of my parents. There is a company that is called Orkin in Colorado - they deal in pest control. So, the Orkin guy that my parents always had come to the house, was there, spraying for bugs, and he told my mom, "I heard you guys were looking to adopt. Well my sister is having a child and she is looking to put the child up for adoption. Let me know if you guys are interested." They ended up calling him and then the whole process commenced. Later on, I remember my mom telling me what happened and it is actually quite funny: my dad found out that Michelle was having twins, and he called my mom in the staff lounge in between her flights and this is what transpired:<br />
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<em>Dad: "I have good news and bad news. Which one do you want first?"</em><br />
<em>Mom: "Tell me the bad news first."</em><br />
<em>Dad: "Well, we won't be able to afford that car we were looking at..."<br />Mom: "Okay, what's the good news?"</em><br />
<em>Dad: "We're having twins!"</em><br />
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My mom was a flight attendant at the time and as she was rolling the beverage cart down the aisle on her next flight, she kept giving passengers the wrong drink. The second flight attendant with her would fix it and then apologize saying, "Excuse her, she just found out she is having twins. One guy looked at my mom, looked at her abdomen, and said in disbelief, "You would never know!" Haha :) - I just remember that specific part of the story. What's amazing is that my mom always felt like she was going to have twins. Even when they were in the process of trying to adopt that little boy, she felt she was going to have twins. She was in prayer, though, and look how that worked out. God is amazing. <br />
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I am so thankful to have these two things be a part of my story. Awareness should never stop. They've shaped my personality and my character in ways I never would've hoped. God's plan goes beyond me; it goes beyond you; and It remains faithful through the centuries. <br />
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<em>"For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."</em></div>
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<em>-Psalm 100:5</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-88633463364889365572013-10-26T10:21:00.000-05:002013-10-26T10:21:04.457-05:00You Never Know<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">So, I’ve had this on my heart for the past couple days. You
just never know what other people are going through/have gone through. I mean,
when you meet someone, your first instinct isn’t to ask the person what their
deepest, darkest secrets are. It’s not until you really get to know someone
that they may open up and share. Have you ever known someone for a little while
and think you know most things about them, then learn something about their
life that completely blows your mind? I have. It’s weird.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It makes you feel like you really don’t know
a person. Maybe it makes you have more respect for that person. Maybe some
other things about their personality finally make sense to you. Maybe you just
can’t wrap your head around it. No matter your reaction, the fact of the matter
is, you never know what people have gone through. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Working in the psychiatric unit of the hospital this
semester is an example of this. As a society, we tend to judge people who are
different, or put them in a category. So, yeah, you’ll see some people
diagnosed with schizophrenia in the hospital, but you also get depressed people
and a whole variety. As a psych nurse you listen to peoples’ stories. Well,
they do more than that obviously, but it’s a huge part of the job. Some of the
situations you hear about are absolutely unimaginable. If I were to think about
the worst thing that has ever happened to me, it wouldn’t even compare to the
lives of some of these people. Even some of the friends I’ve had have surprised
me with things that they’ve gone through that I just had no idea. Some people
just know how to keep it together. They know how to keep other people out of
it. They know how to avoid those touchy subjects. And I’m talking about serious
things here, guys. I’m talking about abusive relationships (physical and
emotional), rape, friends/family being killed, sibling issues, and family
problems. The everyday person you see could be struggling with something you can't even imagine. And he/she is smiling through it. People I have known have opened up to me and I'm just astonished that they have been through so much more than I could've imagined. Their personalities didn't suggest anything to me and I just realized how incredibly blessed/protected I am.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I just think, as Christ followers, we need to be aware of
the needs of others. We don’t necessarily need to know what goes on in
other people’s lives if they don’t want to share, but we just need to be aware
of peoples’ condition. When you ask how someone is, really care about how they
are. Really try and understand how they’re feeling. If they answer with the
standard, “Good, thanks, how are you?” just stop and prompt them to really tell
you how things are going. And, the same goes for you. If someone takes the time
to really ask how you are, tell them the truth. I am guilty of answering with the standard reply as well, so I need to work on this too. It's the worst thing when you or someone else believes you cannot go on. Be there for each other. Open up and tell someone if you are struggling. We can't do this alone. We need each other to lean on. If you have Christ, you have him to lean on as well, but we need to be in community with each other. Be aware of what others around you are dealing with. You don't know everybody's story, but we are able to take care of each other if we take the time to find out. Thanks for reading.</span><br />
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<em>"If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."</em></div>
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-Philippians 2:1-4</div>
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<em>"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."</em></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-76442612750833622702013-10-16T16:06:00.002-05:002013-10-16T16:06:43.307-05:00IdolatryHere I am, looking at my blank box that says "New Post", waiting for words to come. What has been on my heart lately? That's too much to ask. What has God been teaching me lately? He's always teaching me something. <br />
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So, I'll just take one thing at a time. Something I think God has been trying to teach me for years is that it is so easy to have something be an idol in my life. That sounds awful as I re-read that. Let's think about it. From the moment I was in Sunday School, it was always, "God comes first, you should have no other thing take His place." Okay, easy enough, right? That's not hard to follow. Of course I'm not going to kneel and worship a bronze statue. Wrong. I don't think we realize how easy it is to have something take God's place. It's not always a bronze statue. It's something we base our life off of. It can be an idea, an ideal. We can always say, "Well, of course God is always first. I always give him the glory, and He is always foremost in my mind." Let's be real with each other, with ourselves...that's not always the case. I've done this with a few things in my life. And, with each one, it's not until it has been going on for awhile that I realize it has consumed me. Idolatry seems like something you can easily avoid, but it almost is an insidious onset. You don't realize you're doing it until it literally consumes you. Let me just list some things that I think about as being idols sometimes so maybe you can have something in mind as we talk about this...<br />
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Your present job.</div>
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One of those things hopefully reverberated within you. In high school, my idol was swimming. I've discussed this in a previous blog post. If you look back on whatever it was that you held as your idol, let me ask you, what did God do with that? Perhaps you're still in the middle of making that thing your idol. Perhaps God took it away from you. God took swimming away from me in college. That is, he didn't take it away, it just didn't work out, and I couldn't understand why for the longest time. The more I didn't swim, the more I realized it was bringing me away from God, not bringing me closer. </div>
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<em><strong><span style="color: #3d85c6;">"Those who cling to worthless idols turn away from God's love for them."</span></strong></em></div>
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<strong><span style="color: #3d85c6;"> - Jonah 2:8</span></strong></div>
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<strong><span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em>"All who make idols are nothing, and the things they treasure are worthless. Those who would speak up for them are blind; they are ignorant, to their own shame...Such a person feeds on ashes; a deluded heart misleads him; he cannot save himself, or say, 'Is this thing in my right hand a lie?'"</em> -Isaiah 44:9,20</span></strong></div>
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How about those verses, huh? Pretty powerful. And, make no mistake, sometimes it's hard to realize you are making something an idol. But, ask yourself this. Is there something that occupies your thoughts much more than you ever intended it to? Are your feelings of self worth coming from the success or failure of that thing? Is it taking away from your time with God? If you answered yes to any of those, be cautious and aware. And, you have to be honest with yourself. Otherwise, this doesn't work and it just gets swept under the rug and you're enabling the problem to fester.</div>
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I also think the concepts of love/relationships are huge. So many of those idols I listed above come from wanting to be/feel loved. I think it's amazing that even though we struggle with idolatry (name me one person who hasn't) God pursues us and wants us back. He wants us with Him. He wants us to have a fulfilling relationship with Him, first. He wants us to be happy. Think about it, when you are following an idol, and it falls apart, you're not happy, right? You feel awful, you feel like a failure. You feel shame. You feel unworthy. That does not come from God. That does not come from God. Be aware of your idols. Be in prayer about them. If that means God taking it away from you in some way, you will be better off. Read the verse below. This is in John, and it is a prayer from Jesus for all believers. Jesus is praying this for US, as he prayed for his disciples in the previous verses. </div>
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<em><strong><span style="color: #3d85c6;">"'My prayer is not for them [His disciples] alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one - I in them and you in me - so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world...'"</span></strong></em></div>
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<strong><span style="color: #3d85c6;">-John 17:20-24</span></strong></div>
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God prayed for us to be with Him where He is. He wants us with Him. He wants nothing to take us away from him, and that's exactly what these idols do. If you're struggling with something like this, do something about it. Talk to someone you trust. Pray about it. Separate yourself from that thing. Let someone keep you accountable. It's hard, but once it is out in the open and you begin dealing with it, your heart will feel lighter and you will re-experience the unconditional love God has for you. That's what has been on my heart.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-85638721729105429552013-09-24T11:19:00.004-05:002013-09-24T11:19:41.649-05:00FulfillmentI've learned a lot about fulfillment in my lifetime and by no means do I still grasp the concept. I think a lot of people need to be reminded of this, me included, that God is our only fulfillment.<br />
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I can't tell you how many times I've tried to be fulfilled by other things in my life. I've always been a believer, but I haven't always acted like it. All of this awareness came to me I think once high school started. I would go to youth group and church, but I never grasped how God was my only fulfillment. <br />
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Let's start with school. I've always been in advanced classes, on the honor roll, whatever you want to call it. Grades have always been a huge part of my life. In college, I've learned to accept B's. Nursing school is hard. But, when I got a C or a low B in high school, I would be very upset with myself and my performance. "I don't get B's." I did well for myself in high school. But, when I failed my first test in college, I can't describe to you the feeling I had about myself. My self worth manifested in how I felt about my grades! Granted, I'm not saying stop worrying about trying to do well in school, no, but when your self worth is affected by the grade you make in a class? That is when trouble comes along. I had to learn that the hard way. Being in nursing school, I still struggle with that at times. Those tests measure how much content you know and if you can apply it to the job. When I do worse than I had hoped for, I have to remind myself that once I have that RN degree, that one little test won't make or break my career. It shouldn't affect my self worth.<br />
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Let's move onto swimming. If you know me at all, you know I don't ever stop relating something to swimming. Those of you who played sports in high school, or still play sports, just think about your sport. My high school career was filled with swimming. I wanted to make sectionals for club, I wanted to be on varsity, I wanted to get times that I could use to swim at a D1 college. Let me tell you a thought that I remember telling myself. "I can't wait until I'm 20, I'm going to be a junior in college, I'm going to be at my prettiest, and I'm going to be in the best shape of my life because I'll be swimming at my college. It's going to be great." Wow. Now that I look back on that, I am appalled. It's actually somewhat embarrassing to admit that, but I don't think I've been alone in thinking that. Where was my fulfillment coming from at that point? Not God, that's for certain. Only when things were going well did I sometimes thank God for allowing me to be successful. The moments that didn't go so well? It was a reflection off of me. I was channeling my self worth into my accomplishments. I was only looking forward to what I was going to be in college. Again, I'm not saying don't try to be successful in sports. But when it is your source of self worth, that's when you have to be careful.<br />
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Let's try this one. Relationships. This applies to guys and girls. How many of you have reflected your self worth based off of a relationship? Too many. I'm also guilty of this. It's hard not to do, especially when you think very highly of one person and really care about how they perceive you. Ladies, self worth is not reflected in how many times a guy/your boyfriend tells you that you're pretty, or gorgeous, or hot. Guys, your self worth is not reflected in how many times a girl/your girlfriend tells you that she wants to be with you forever, or that you're the most handsome guy, or how many posts she puts on Facebook about you for the world to see. Those things aren't necessarily harmful, but when that is the only thing that reflects your self worth, you've got a problem. If it's a Christ-centered relationship, your significant other should be doing nothing but helping you grow and develop your faith. That person should be making you feel worthwhile, that's important, but that's not your main source of self worth. <br />
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It's funny how God works. He led me to be a part of nursing school where 100% on a test doesn't just happen. I'm not even swimming in college. That was a very difficult transition, and I miss swimming at times. But He took away the recognition that I wanted from swimming from my heart because it was gradually destroying me and leading me farther away from Him. That's amazing. I didn't even know what was happening. God has been gracious to me in relationships and I've not always been successful in not allowing it to consume me, but I know where my heart stands, I know I'm a daughter of Christ, and I'm not willing to cross boundaries. With His strength, I've been able to confront it.<br />
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Your self worth comes from your heart. And where does The Holy Spirit dwell? In your heart, in your being...I need to remind myself of this daily. When there are so many things in this world telling you where your self worth should be coming from and how you can feel better about yourself, it's hard to always channel your self worth from God in your heart. So, if life has been unkind to you lately, and you can't seem to get out of it, and your self worth is just laying dormant under a rock, think about to whom you belong. You don't want those you love to feel worthless. God is the same. He doesn't want those He loves [everybody] to feel worthless. That's not His goal. He is and always will be enough for you, even if you don't realize it. Don't stop smiling, don't stop loving, don't stop sharing with people how much God loves them. I've grown so much since I started college - in a good way. There have been some hard lessons, but I've turned out better because of it. My fulfillment comes from nothing more than Christ. It's a relief, really. God loves you, He thinks you're worthwhile, He wants you to feel loved. Don't forget it.<br />
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<em>"The Lord is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion. The Lord protects the unwary; when I was brought low, he saved me. Return to your rest, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you. For you, Lord, have delivered me from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before the Lord in the land of the living."</em></div>
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<em>-Psalm 116:5-9</em></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-72673408208762127772013-09-08T16:08:00.000-05:002013-09-08T16:08:19.850-05:00PassionateWell, I do apologize for the lack of blog posts within the last month! It has been a crazy start to the year, even though I am excited for it! I hope this post finds many of you well. This year, in school, I am going to be involved in my Adult 1 clinical and Psychiatric mental health nursing clinical. I refer to the latter as my psych clinical, but don't be fooled, it's not exactly psychology. Anyway, I had that clinical yesterday, and let me tell you, I loved it. The first few weeks I'm going to be working with Alzheimer's clients. I just have to tell you a quick story and then I'll be onto my topic for today. Long story short, I was giving a cup of water to one of the clients and she grabbed onto my hand as I gave her the water and then kissed it! It was the sweetest thing and I didn't know exactly how to react! But it was very sweet and I just smiled and went about my business. But that will most likely stick with me for some time!<br />
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Alright, onto today's topic. I was filling out an application the other day and one of the questions was: What are you passionate about? Now, normally, I would give a sigh of frustration. That question used to always be so hard to answer. But, I sat and thought about it and I realized that my definition of what passion is has changed over time. I would have originally said something to the effect of, "Well, I'm passionate about swimming and going to a great college and...etc." It's amazing how God works. Swimming isn't such a huge part of my life in the present. I am going to a great college but the stress of trying to get into one is over. This is what I've realized: <strong>being passionate means doing something in the hope of evoking change in something or someone else.</strong> <br />
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Have you ever thought about it that way? If I say, "I'm passionate about nursing", well, I want to create change in people's health. I want to be an advocate for a healthy lifestyle. I want to be an advocate for taking care of the heart and mind and in turn taking care of the physical body. If I say, "I'm passionate about reading", I want people to love reading as much as I do and learn to appreciate literature. If I say, "I'm passionate about writing", I want to keep that old way of communication alive. And I do! If I say, "I'm passionate about Christ", I want to evoke change with that statement and I want people to share in the same grace and salvation that I do every day.<br />
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So, now how would you feel about me saying God is passionate about us? Well, that's weird. How can the God of the universe be passionate about us? I mean, when you think about it, we're pretty pathetic compared to Him. And that's mildly putting it. So, God is passionate about us. Okay, so He is hoping to evoke change in us? No. He IS evoking change. Every day. He gives us passion for Him so we can turn around and invoke that passion in someone else. There is a great quote by Rick Warren and he says "God is love. He didn't need us. But he wanted us. And that is the most amazing thing." It's so true. Let that fact sink in. I mean, think about it. He <em>died</em> for us. He died for His cause. He died to evoke change. He died to instill passion in His believers. Now how does that make you feel? I know it makes me feel like His passion deserves my undivided attention. Food for thought.<br />
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<em>"The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing."</em></div>
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<em>-Zephaniah 3:17</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-44383047581781203062013-08-12T09:32:00.001-05:002013-08-12T09:32:44.436-05:00The Pages of Spiritual WarfareYou know those books that make you want to be a better person after reading them? I've only read a few of those books: <u>Redeeming Love</u> and the Mark of the Lion series by Francine Rivers come to mind. Well, I just got through reading a book called<em> </em><u>This Present Darkness</u> by Frank Peretti. Boy, was it good. Just to give you a heads up, if you haven't read it, it's a book on spiritual warfare and it's intertwined with a wonderfully written fiction/thriller story. When you read it, it gives you some thought on the subject of spiritual warfare and the constant battle going on outside of our senses. I highly recommend it!<br />
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As Christians, we talk about spiritual warfare, not that often I might add, but I don't think we really grasp the concept. I know I certainly don't. It's almost something foreign to me. My whole idea of this warfare has been something along the lines of thinking that spiritual battles between demons and angels happen, but as long as I'm a human, I really have no say in the matter. After all, the big battle hasn't happened yet, right? It seems like a separate, distant occurrence. It's just kind of a thing I never thought of as being so close around us. The way Peretti writes his book is astounding. It really paints a picture of the demons and angels.<br />
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Guardian angels. We all like the sound of that, right? I have a keychain that's supposed to go on your car keys and it says 'never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly'. You've probably heard testimonies about people being saved by one or a divine interference happening just at the right moment? I have, and those stories always leave me a little breathless. It all sounds so...almost impossible. Well, it's not. The way Peretti writes his book, we have guardian angels around us all the time. All day, every day, protecting us from demons everywhere. It's amazing to think that as I go about my day, blissfully unaware of what is going on in the spiritual realm at that particular moment, angels are warding off demons. It takes on a whole new meaning about your heart and spirit being protected by the Lord. Another thing that Peretti does in his book which I really like is that he gives names to demons. For example: lust, complacency, deception, hatred, anger... I could go on. They have that one specific purpose and they attack unsuspecting humans. It's hard to wrap my mind around. But the coolest thing in the book, in my opinion, is Peretti illustrating the power of prayer and how God can bestow the greatest purpose on someone unsuspecting but faithful. It's heart-wrenching, in a very good way, to read about these small characters who have such a steadfast faith and who follow God's guidance in steps of faith. The little inklings they have come from their guardian angels. The urges to pray that burden their soul, are put there by their guardian angels who need the prayers for strength and success. I mean, it's mind blowing. The pictures Peretti paints of angels literally walking on either side of a godly man as he follows the Holy Spirit's urging in his soul, their swords sheathed, ready to protect, is mind blowing. I've never really thought about it that way. Prayer is the most important thing in Peretti's book. It gives the guardians strength, it significantly weakens the demonic attacks, and it illustrates the importance of being in communication with our Lord. Not just Him hearing us, but us hearing Him as well.<br />
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It's mind blowing, this spiritual warfare stuff. I'm certainly no expert at it. I'm not even halfway decent at describing it, I suppose. All I can say is that it's crazy to think it is so close and so real. And the funny thing is, we all are oblivious. We are worried about what we're going to eat for lunch for goodness sake. I worry about whether I'll get enough sleep to get me through the next day or worry about the grade on that test. Things are so much bigger than we realize. I suggest you get some pleasure reading in before school starts, and <u>This Present Darkness</u> comes highly recommended (by me). And you should read every bit of the Scripture below :) - they are some great verses!<br />
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<em>"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."</em></div>
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<em>-Ephesians 6:10-12</em></div>
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<em>"You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that - and shudder."</em></div>
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<em>-James 2:19</em></div>
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<em>"Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."</em></div>
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<em>-1 Peter 5:8-10</em></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-41229836517175017952013-07-26T08:44:00.002-05:002013-07-26T08:44:26.904-05:00Faith, Trust, and Pixie DustSo a couple evenings ago I was sitting next to my grandma, holding her hand, trying to keep her calm as she seemed restless. She kept saying she needed to take care of something and I just told her that I would take care of whatever she needed done, that she didn't have to worry about anything. She looked at me and said "You're an angel." Needless to say, I was quite taken aback. I couldn't think of what to say. So, being the genius I am (haha) I came up with "Oh, no, I'm just Morgan..."<br />
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Now that I think about it, that could've been meant in two different ways. Maybe she actually thought I was an angel. Or maybe she thought I was just acting like an angel. I don't know which one she meant. Not that it matters. The good thing is that I kept her calm. It just struck something in me because I know Alzheimer's is a tough disease. There are days where my grandma knows who I am and days where she doesn't. Having her in the house, though, makes you appreciate those lucid moments. My grandma is pretty sharp, but you can tell the times where she gets frustrated and the times where she is fully aware. <br />
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Have you ever had a moment where everything just clicked? You are fully aware, you know who you are, what you are, and what you stand for. Often, when this happens to me, it's my faith talking. Sometimes I just know that God is with me and He has planned for something to happen. The longer you are a Christian, the more comfortable you get with your faith. So, when something occurs that "isn't part of the plan" you start wondering where God is leading you. Sometimes you can guess and sometimes you don't. At times I envy those people that have certain clarity of what God wants for them. Most of us struggle to understand.<br />
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I've only had a few of these moments. It's usually when I'm alone. It happened once when I went on a hike (in Colorado of course) and I just spent time appreciating what was around me. It has happened at a couple of random times where I just knew I was in the right place. I felt completely sure, I felt at peace, and I felt the overwhelming assurance of God's love. The longer you are a Christian and the more you get into a routine, I feel that the more you should try and fight for those lucid moments - those moments when you just know - those moments where you live in the present in full belief of the future God has for you. For many of us, those moments don't happen every day.<br />
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I need to work on this just as much as everyone else. I get into my routine and forget to fight for those lucid moments of faith. I get caught up in so many different aspects of life that I miss the joy that's right in front of me. Even though I've been a Christian for so long, I have to constantly practice because I will never be perfect. I will never be an angel on this earth, but I can definitely embrace what God has promised to His believers and extend it to those who could use a little faith, trust, and pixie dust.<br />
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<em>"Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."</em></div>
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<em>-Isaiah 40:30-31</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-36682466346588235712013-07-21T14:21:00.002-05:002013-07-21T14:21:15.931-05:00It's Not About You...AgainSo, I have a blogger app on my phone. I was messing around with it earlier and going back to read an old post because I saw a facebook status that reminded me of it. I wanted to post the link. But, I started re-reading it and I saw a comma was missing so one of my sentences almost didn't make sense. So, because I'm a grammar nazi and I just need the correct punctuation, I edited it and pushed the save button. Well, it moved that post up to the top of all my other posts. So, being a genius who just woke up, I pressed the delete button because it would have put all of my other posts not in order. Realizing what I just did, I panicked and immediately went on my computer to see if it actually deleted that post off of my blog. It did. And here I am. So then I got to thinking, well, I can't get that post back, but I can certainly re-visit the topic. And here it is. <br />
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Meeting someone who thinks he/she did something so horrible that God can't forgive them is discouraging for Christ believers because we know that's not true. But, if you've ever encountered a person like that, you know they are hard to talk to because they always come back to the same complaint. God can't forgive me for what I've done. He can't possibly forgive a thing like that. Well, news flash, He can. More and more I have come to know those people as somewhat selfish. <br />
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For the people that have that mindset, I often just want to tell them to get over themselves. What they have done isn't worse than what someone else has done in their lifetime. It's Not About You. It's not about what you have done, what sin you have committed. In God's eyes, sin is sin. One sin is not ranked higher than the other so He has to give you more forgiveness for it. On Earth, we like to rank sins. Stealing can be a misdemeanor. Murder deserves the death sentence. In God's eyes, all sin deserves a death sentence. Luckily, He took care of that for us a long time ago. It's Not About You. This self-defeatist attitude I've been talking about comes from being selfish and only pitying what plight you're in.<br />
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This is all about what God has done for you; this is all about what God has done for me. Don't insult God's offered gift because you feel like you can't be forgiven. Sin is sin in God's eyes. One is not worse than the other. Those who struggle with feeling as if they can't be forgiven, I've got a message for you. It's not about you. It's not about what you've done. It's about what God has given to you no matter where you are in life. God wants you, He wants a relationship with you. Don't run, because life will always catch up with you anyway.<br />
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<em>"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith - and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God - not by works, so that no one can boast."</em></div>
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<em>-Ephesians 2:8-9</em></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-91533763896704812722013-07-09T15:21:00.001-05:002013-07-09T15:21:59.543-05:00Influential<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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You know, I was watching a Grey's Anatomy episode a couple of days ago and
this one patient on the show is engaged, is a virgin, and is waiting to have
sex until she gets married. Of course, the doctors are all making fun of it
outside of the room when it gets out that one of the residents is a virgin. Of
course, they proceed to make fun of her as well. All fun aside in watching
Grey's Anatomy, how wrong is that? I was very disconcerted. This message is on
national TV. This message is going out to every single person that watches
Grey’s Anatomy. I mean, I know the times I'm growing up in are different than
even my parents' time, but the thought that an attitude towards virginity such
as this, on a show as popular as Grey's Anatomy, is airing for the world to see
disheartens me. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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I'm upset about the message it sends to young girls out there. And I'm not
talking about "young people". I'm only 20 and I consider myself quite
young, thank you. Girls in college, girls graduating high school, and girls
just leaning to be themselves are influenced by this mindset. Guys, you are
also influenced by this mindset. The message being sent to everyone watching
that episode is "Wow, you're actually a virgin?! Haha, that's ridiculous,
you should feel uncomfortable with that." This is a touchy subject for some
girls and for some it's not even a subject of consequence. Nevertheless, a
message like that should not be so lightly addressed. I have had this belief for the duration of my existence so far: there is
nothing wrong with keeping your virginity until marriage. Even if you've been
dating someone for a very long time, I feel that there is absolutely no
obligation to the guy or girl to take the relationship to that level without
marriage. Nobody should be made fun of for it either. If you’re
experiencing that, take heart and stand firm. There is nothing wrong with what
you are standing for. There are multiple verses in Scripture telling all of us
(guys and girls) to honor their bodies through Christ. We all have our
own opinions on the subject, but I know if you're a believer in Christ with me,
girls, you should get the same feeling. </div>
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And let me clarify, if something has happened, you are a Christian girl, and
you regret a decision, you can still be right with God. There are messages in
scripture that tell us to not have sex before marriage (<em>Hebrews 13:4, 1
Corinthians 6:13, Colossians 3:5</em>), but God gives forgiveness if you ask for it
from your heart. All is not lost. I'm not trying to tell everybody the way
it should be, I'm just giving you something to think about. Speaking to
those who have given up their virginity, I do not claim to know what you’ve
been through, what you’ve experienced. I am not judging you; I am in no place
to judge anyone, ever. I don’t know whether you regret the decision or not, but
if you do regret it, it’s okay to ask for the forgiveness already given to you
through Christ. God doesn’t love you less, I don’t love you less, not one
person should love you less.</div>
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So, if you're the patient in this situation, good for you. You've followed
Christ in your heart, you’ve followed your faith, and you’re sticking to your
morals. If you're the doctors making fun of that patient, leave him/her alone,
and ask yourself why you're making fun of that person. Do you regret a
decision? Do you not feel right about a decision? Why are you putting that person
down? And, if you are that resident being made fun of, let me tell you, there
is nothing to be ashamed of. I must speak my mind. People may not understand faith, or may not
understand your reasoning, but don't give up something so precious just because
this world tells you to give in. </div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Questions? Thoughts? Let me know.</span></div>
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<a href="mailto:morgantturley@gmail.com"><span style="color: blue; font-size: x-small;">morgantturley@gmail.com</span></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">or comment below</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><em><span style="font-size: small;">"Flee from sexual
immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever
sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies
are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?
You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your
bodies."</span></em></span></div>
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<em><span style="font-size: small;">-1 Corinthians 6:18-20</span></em></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><em>“It is God’s will that you should be
sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should
learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in
passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter
no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister. The Lord will
punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before.
For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore,
anyone who rejects this instruction does not reject a human being but God, the
very God who gives you his Holy Spirit.”</em></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><em>-1 Thessalonians 4:3-8</em></span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-50274536032355252582013-07-05T08:47:00.000-05:002013-07-05T08:47:43.959-05:00Do Not AttemptDo you ever wish that life events had labels on them? Like a "Do Not Attempt" label. That friendship that caused you a million issues? Before you entered in, don't you wish life warned you? Don't you wish it told you 'do not attempt'? That relationship with that boyfriend or girlfriend you had? If they weren't your guy or girl, don't you wish that relationship had a 'do not attempt' label?<br />
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Not eating your vegetables. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Eating an undercooked burger. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Watching that one video. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Breaking that rule. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Rationalizing. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Relying on your own judgment. Do Not Attempt.</div>
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Picking a Fight. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Watching that R rated movie. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Meeting that guy/girl. Do Not Attempt.</div>
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Applying for that job. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Hanging out around drugs and alcohol. Do Not Attempt.</div>
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Smoking just this once. Do Not Attempt.</div>
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Getting drunk. Do Not Attempt.</div>
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Having sex before marriage. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Pledging your life to this person. Do Not Attempt.<br />
Walking away from God. Do Not Attempt.</div>
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Personally, I wish that my faith was like that sometimes. Do Not Attempt those things that will bring you farther from God. It would make free will and those choices so much easier, don't you think? If only God put those labels up, right? Sometimes I think that way and then I have to stop myself. Let's think about why God doesn't do that for us.</div>
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First off, that attitude isn't exactly a 'put God first' attitude. All it would be doing is making our lives easier. That's a 'me' attitude if I ever saw one. How can God make my life easier? Sure, it would be nice if God told us what to do, but He already does in a way! His word. The more time we spend with Him, the clearer those choices will be. The more time we spend with Him the more our hearts will be transformed. I'm convicted in this as much as some of you, and it's something I need to work on. Secondly, how else are we going to grow in the Spirit? If answers to our questions were provided, we wouldn't have to pray for guidance. Like me, I know some of you turn to the Lord when you have hardship in your life and not as much when everything is going well. Not that you or I don't ever praise Him in the good moments, but it is common. With all the answers, we wouldn't have guilt or unnecessary pain because it would be easy to make the right choice. But, isn't that how God teaches us sometimes? Isn't learning the hard way how He has to send a message to us sometimes? Yes. </div>
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So, the more I think about having all the answers, the more I think about how easy life would be and how many growing opportunities would escape us. I can't speak for you, but even though I would like to get everything right, I would not want to give up my opportunities to grow in the Lord. So, instead of wishing for obvious, physical 'Do Not Attempt' labels, we should look for those labels in His Word. They are there, you just have to look for them and heed their warnings. It's always a learning process.<br />
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<em>"The fear of the Lord is pure, enduring forever. The decrees of the Lord are firm, and all of them are righteous. They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the honeycomb. By them your servant is warned; in keeping them there is great reward."</em></div>
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<em>-Psalm 19:10-11</em></div>
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<em>"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction."</em></div>
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<em>-Proverbs 1:7</em></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00132707806728429150noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3938470914940990986.post-40664646846079996272013-05-28T11:23:00.002-05:002013-05-28T11:23:38.579-05:00Guiltless JoyHello everybody! I hope your summer has been going well so far! <br />
So, I do apologize for the delay in writing another post. The fact is, I've been experiencing a bit of writer's block lately. I just haven't heard anything or thought of anything lately it seems worth blogging about, until this morning in the shower! <br />
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Have you ever felt guilty for getting your way? For example, when Madison and I were younger, we got in fights, like most siblings do. It was usually because we disagreed on something or wanted something our way. Well, I would argue and argue until Madison saw the light. Then, once she caved in, I would suddenly feel guilty. I would try and appeal to her and say, "Oh, no, it's okay, we can do it your way." I always felt like I coerced her into agreeing. And it was the same way the other way around. It's the same way with some things this summer. I am going to Disney World this June with my mom and Madison. I am so excited and I know that I've wanted to go for awhile now. But, once my mom got the reservations and spent the money, I felt guilty. I know she isn't made of money and we don't have a tree that grows money in the backyard. I'm over that now, but it's that first moment when you realize things are going your way that you feel guilty. I wonder if I'm unique in feeling that way. <br />
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Sometimes, it's the same way with my faith. At times I feel guilty when I'm happy. Not in the sense that I want to be miserable, but when everything seems to be going my way, I stop for a minute and ask myself if I took a wrong turn or if I missed something God was trying to teach me. For some reason it's worse during times like summer. During school, when I'm busy with my nursing stuff or when I fall into bed exhausted at night, I feel happy and I don't feel guilty about it because I see everything God is blessing me with. But, during times like summer when I have much more free time on my hands and I don't have school to worry about, it's easy for me to fall into the guilt trap. This is coming from the fact that my summers feel a whole lot different than my summers in Colorado. My friends don't live 15 minutes away from me. I have to apply for a new job. My living conditions have changed drastically. It's easier to rely on God when I'm struggling with something. But, I am happy. I can use all of these excuses to make something wrong with my life when there really is nothing wrong. I enjoy the time to myself, and it's nice having a break from school, but I miss that never-ending busy feeling. When I have time on my hands, my brain wanders. I start wondering where there is strife in my life and what God may be trying to teach me. Is this making any sense? I start wondering about things that are going well like relationships with friends or being able to fully relax, and I wonder if I'm just making myself happy on a human level. Am I being selfish? Am I disregarding God? Am I missing something He is trying to teach me? <br />
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It's a weird feeling, I know. I get frustrated with myself sometimes about it. I'm like, "Why can't you just be happy, Morgan?! What's wrong with being happy? What's the harm in giving yourself a break?" I feel guilty that I'm happy with worldly things, when I'm not giving back. I don't know if you guys struggle with this at all, but I wanted to look up some scripture because I struggle with this during the summer most of all. <br />
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<span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em><strong>"He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one ccan fathom what God has done from beginning to end. I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil - this is the gift of God"</strong></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em><strong>-Ecclesiastes 3:11-13</strong></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em><strong>"A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit."</strong></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em><strong>-Proverbs 15:13</strong></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em><strong>"When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider this: God has made the one as well as the other. Threrfore, no one can discover anything about their future."</strong></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em><strong>-Ecclesiastes 7:14</strong></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em><strong>"You who are young, be happy while you are young, and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and whatever your eyes see, but know that for all these things God will bring you into judgment."</strong></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #3d85c6;"><em><strong>-Ecclesiastes 11:9</strong></em></span></div>
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<span style="color: #eeeeee;">Well, gosh, this is interesting. Here I am trying to look up a variety of verses, and the ones that stuck, out to me were mostly in Ecclesiastes. I need to work on being happy in the right things. From these verses, there is nothing wrong with being happy on this earth. God has given good and bad times and they are all meant for my and your greater good. No evil comes from God. He wants us to be happy in the right things. I need to work on this just as much as some of you. If you feel that God brought a blessing into your life, enjoy it as that blessing. If I feel that God brought something into my life as a blessing, I need to accept it as such.</span></div>
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