May 25, 2012

A Teardrop Meant For Home

I don't know what it is.... I don't know whether I'm just PMSing or if things have finally built up to my limit or if I just need sleep, but gosh emotions have a way of creeping up on you. It's rather inconvenient. This feeling of homesickness just spontaneously combusted in me tonight. I mean, it even brought me to tears once I knew I was just alone in my new room.

I miss home. I miss the house that doesn't belong to my family anymore in Colorado. I miss my few close friends back there. You know, I hate the fact that I have to think about where I would stay if I went back home. I don't want to stay with my dad and staying at a friend's house just seems so weird and unnecessary. I don't need to inconvenience them, especially if I have a parent living there.

I miss the mountains. I miss the ridiculous weather and the random thunderstorms that happen in the afternoon during the summer. I just feel helpless really, waiting around here to go to summer school. I miss just getting in the car and driving to meet people somewhere. I miss my family being in the same state. I miss my room. I miss my backyard. I miss Colorado.

Things certainly aren't the same anymore. Hopefully this nostalgia is all just temporary. But I just needed to vent. It's not a very happy night for my turbulent thoughts.

God, what in the world are you doing? Please help me trust you.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."
-Proverbs 3:5-6

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