Heartfelt Emotions

Greetings!

Well, I have finished the second book of the Mark of the Lion trilogy, and I'm well into the third! It is so good! I literally fall in love with fictional characters, but there is something different about these characters. They make me feel like I need to work on serving my friends and family with just complete humility. I need to be humble. The hope and the loyalty I see in these characters bring tears to my eyes. It also is giving me a beautiful hope that God really does work through tribulation to bring you to Him. It gives me hope that He has so many plans and will bring me to the right people and help me hopefully help me to touch those who come into my life. It is also giving me hope that God will bring the right guy to me someday. He will lead me there, but I need to love God first before I can find the things I'm searching for. It's just worth waiting for the right person, no matter what that means. It gives me hope and makes me able to bear my want of finding love elsewhere, when I know it's not right. Everything is never fulfilling enough unless you have God. God is the only thing that can fill that hole that you I am desperately trying to fill with worldly things. I'm speaking to myself here, but I have no doubt that there are others who need to realize this same thing, me most of all. These are probably the best books I've read.

Weird how reading a book can bring me encouragement... :)


Ignite tonight was pretty eye opening. One of my biggest struggles where it's hard to give God His rightful authority is with events in my life. I want so badly to control things that it causes so much stress when things don't go as I thought they would. Partially because I don't ever want to hurt people, which ends up happening sometimes, and I know the authority is not mine to have. I forget so many times that God is in complete control. I only have to follow, but I never knew following could prove to be so difficult. I struggle with handing situations over to God. I say He is in control, but half the time, I'm only saying the words. I'm secretly and desperately trying to control what happens. Notice how we always give thanks to God when things go exactly our way and blame Him when they don't? I certainly am guilty of that. I hate to admit it, but I am. I do it daily. I wish my faith was stronger. I wish I had the guts to give my life over to God when He holds the utmost power. I cling to the little things in life without realizing God already knows what I will experience with the outcome. I look elsewhere for worldly satisfaction when there is none. The only prayer that comes to my mind when I see I'm guilty of it again and again is "Forgive me for my weaknesses." Isn't that the only thing I can say? I have no right to claim anything. God is authority. He continues to mold my spirit every day, I only hope I have the strength to accept whatever that entails.

Thanks for reading.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."

-Proverbs 3:5-6

Thoughts and Happenings

Hey guys!


Well, I have started reading my book. And, those who told me I wouldn't be able to put it down? You were right. I mean, I have some homework, but not important enough to put the book down! Coming from me, you know it's good. I've actually read the 496 page book this weekend. So, I'm finished with it. It literally made me tear up at the end. For some reason, Francine Rivers' books just kind of tug at your heart. I love it.

Anyway, it's been a pretty good week! I've been to Billy Bobs three days in a row now...so pretty tired from lack of sleep, but it was a very fun three nights! This week, I have to focus though...I have a test in Human Development, which won't be too bad as it is a review chapter. The class reminds me a lot of AP Psych...so yeah.

I watched the 10th anniversary version of Les Miserables today with my friend Caleigh! Oh my gosh. It is so amazing and it tugs at my heart every time I watch it. The emotion is so raw and the talent is absolutely incredible. I mean, I'm obsessed with Colm Wilkinson as Jean Valjean and Michael Ball as Marius, and I can't forget Philip Quast as Javert. There is so much courage in the characters. The soundtrack is on Itunes!!! Happy day :). I wish I had the musical talent to participate in these things. As I am content with the things God has blessed me with, I just think it would be such a fun job to perform. But, hey, let's leave that to the experts, shall we?

Lea Salonga as Eponine and Michael Ball as Marius

Colm Wilkinson as Jean Valjean

Philip Quast as Javert

Allana and Caleigh and I attended McKinney church this morning for a change from Christ chapel. I enjoyed it! The speaker was awesome and he was talking about taking that step of faith even when it involves trouble. That trouble is the first step God is leading you to in order to get you to the place He actually wants you to go. We get in this funk that God isn't supposed to let anything trying happen to us, but that is so wrong. Sometimes the greatest affliction is the greatest blessing. Sometimes those afflictions are God's way of bringing about the blessing we ask for. Speaking of this, I am so excited for Ignite tomorrow night!! :)

I hope you guys have had a wonderful week, and that your week starts off well! Thanks for reading.

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps."

-Proverbs 16:9

Rainy Days

Hello all...

Well, these last couple days have certainly been interesting! Yesterday, here in Texas, it just rained and rained and rained. I finally got to take out the umbrella I brought up with me! It's light blue. I had a bonding moment with one of my good friends Cassie yesterday when our umbrellas both blew out at the exact same time on the way to lunch and we both went "AHHH!" at the exact same time. It was actually quite hilarious. It is days like those when I wish I owned a pair of rain boots, but I don't. In Colorado, shoes that are required are called SNOW boots. Apparently in Texas, that changes to rain boots. I just don't see the point of getting them when I wear them maybe two to three days in a month. I like reusing my shoes, and rain boots I feel would just sit there in my closet...

Today at lunch we had the most interesting conversation about anesthesia and nursing and medical stuff. Stuff I'm obviously interested in (#nursing major). Anyway, we got on the subject of some of us undergoing anesthesia and it was quite entertaining. Some of us wouldn't stop laughing, others of us didn't remember a thing, and others just wanted to yell at the doctors. Then somehow we got on the subject of women and having babies. I made the remark that I don't understand these women who want to have "natural" births. I mean, hellooo??? Enduring that pain?! I'd be saying more things along this line when my time came..."GIVE ME ALL THE DRUGS YOU'VE GOT. NOW!" I've heard that when women give birth for the first time, they look at their husband in the room, usually starstruck that they are now a father, and they say, "You are not touching me, ever again!" Hahahaha that's pretty funny too, although I feel as though I will have the same reaction. So guys, be glad you are guys. I don't really know if I want to have kids...my diabetes and stuff causes issues with that and I'd have to have a carefully planned pregnancy probably. I want to have my own kids, but it scares me that I'd be taking care of two people instead of just one, and that I may give my child diabetes... And almost anything could go wrong. If not, then I would love to adopt! :) Anyway, if you thought that was an awkward subject to discuss, sorry. Me being a nursing major and loving all this stuff, it isn't awkward. It's just another fact of life!

So remember when I talked about the book Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers? Well, I ordered a series from her called the Mark of the Lion series. They came in today!!! It's a trilogy, and apparently is good. Well, if they are as good as Redeeming Love, count me in!!! The first book is called A Voice in the Wind. I'm planning on skipping some of my homework tonight in order to read it haha! That's how excited I am!! I'll let you know how I'm liking the books!

On a random note, I saw this status on facebook that was like, "how would you describe your love life in a word or phrase?" I was looking at the comments, and this one brilliant person said "Gone With the Wind." HAHA!! I thought it hilarious as I love Gone With the Wind, and it definitely pertains to me right about now. Haha good for a laugh :).

By the way...I still love getting letters! So, if you want to write me, please don't hesitate! I'll write you back! I promise. Alright, well there are some things that have started off my week here at TCU. Hope you guys are having a blessed week!

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."

-Lamentations 3:22-23

An Aha! Moment

Good Evening!


I have to share an awesome God moment that I had yesterday. After my last post, I was still feeling a little bit dejected with all those thoughts running through my mind. BUT there is this organization here at TCU and it's called Ignite. It is just an opportunity Monday nights for some of us to get together and worship, and just start off the school week correctly. Well, the worship in itself is what I needed, but the message was incredible. It was like SMACK!!!! And God was saying, "Morgan, this is what you need to hear right now." I mean, it wasn't exactly what I was talking about in my post last night, but it had every importance and related very well! It was such a great moment, and I just needed it. It's amazing what methods God employs for his followers to give them encouragement. I'm going to share a little bit with you...


When we see ourselves, it is like being in a hall of mirrors. You see bits and pieces of what you want to be and what this world has made you into. It may or may not be who you actually are, or who you actually want to be. The speaker was saying that we are always in an identity crisis...for my girls out there, thank you kindly, beauty industry. You know what I'm talking about. Cute clothes, pretty makeup, being 15 pounds underweight...For those guys out there, thank you very much Edward Cullen for setting unattainable standards girls now expect, right?! But we are in this identity crisis. We wonder who we are supposed to be, we wonder what we were meant to do, we wonder about God's plan, and sometimes just feel worthless. [At this point in the message, I was beginning to recognize some of these feelings...] But, we are a new creation in God. We were initially created in God's image. Every single one of us is "made good". "We are made perfect and beautiful, but not made for perfection" were the speaker's words last night. He touched on that theology does not start with us being a worthless human being full of sin. It never did, it started with us being made in God's image. Falling into sin is horrible, but our ugly sin is washed right over with God's grace. No matter how much we try to keep it together, we are incredibly broken, more than we can understand. But God continues and always will LOVE YOU. He loves me. He loves you. He loves His believers. Always. That is quite the comforting thought. :)


Anyway, this will probably be a shorter blog post than the others, but I just needed to share that moment with you guys, especially after my last post. For all my sisters in Christ out there... this book is one you NEED to read if you struggle with some issues I do. Anyone can read it, but it gave me an extra boost of encouragement. Please read it! It is more than worth it. It helps with so many things, and always gives me a good feeling after reading. I couldn't put it down! Even after reading it three times.


That's it for today! Oh, I hope you listened to Josh Groban (see previous post)!!!!!!! :) Thanks for reading.


ONE MORE THING TO REMEMBER:
At the end of the day... you are redeemed and loved. It's that simple.

"It is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God."

-Ephesians 2:8

Pondering My Securities

Salutations!


So, I've been listening to Josh Groban basically all day. He is so fantastic. If you aren't familiar with him, I highly encourage you to listen to him. His voice is so addictive. AND the best part is, is that not all of his songs are in english. Some are in french, some in spanish, and I think some in italian. Who knows, it may be latin. Those of you who are more familiar with Josh Turner, and his deep, gorgeous voice, Josh Groban has that sort of voice except only slightly less deep...and he is not country haha. Anyway, I'll put a link at the end of this for you to go listen to one of my favorite songs from him! Sometimes I wish I was muscially talented. I mean I can play the piano, not very well anymore, but I was pretty good when I was younger! That's not what I mean, though. I love instruments, but I wish I had one of those awesome voices! I suppose with training I could have, but oh well. :) I was too busy with swimming! And I don't regret that for a minute!


So in history we have these map quizzes. Why am I taking a history class when I want to be a nurse you ask? Well... it's required for honors haha. Otherwise I wouldn't be. But we have these map quizzes. I thought I was done with those like my sophomore year of high school. Guess not. But, my history teacher did say she gives them because one student she had one year pointed out Cuba when she was asked to identify Ireland. Now, that is really sad. Most everybody knows the difference between Cuba and Ireland. Don't worry, I do. :)

Also, if you didn't know this about me, I am obsessed with the musical Les Miserables. Josh Groban has that kind of voice that makes me think of it. Michael Ball is also very good, and he is in the 10th Anniversary performance of Les Miserables. Haha bunny trail... but anyway, it is such a great musical. The 10th Anniversary is my favorite. I heard they actually made a movie of it with Liam Neeson as Jean Valjean, but I feel like the movie would ruin the musical.


So, I know I've been blogging every day now. This probably won't keep happening. I know you all are just DYING to hear about my life ;) but I'll definitely try to keep doing it at least every other day. It just depends on the day. It's so weird. My day started off fantastic this morning. I got up, went and worked out, went to class, and have been working on homework. But, it's weird, every time later in the evening, sometimes I start feeling just....worn down I suppose is the correct phrase. Like, I'm still happy, but it's just a weird feeling. Maybe it's because I tend to think about more as the day wears on. Not trivial stuff, but life stuff. Maybe that's what's wearing me down. It being Monday may also be a factor, but this happens more than once a week. Maybe you guys can relate? You probably can. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels this way, but it sure can feel like it. Pondering my future and wondering about my securities in life can be relatively stressful! Then I realize the only secure thing I have really is my faith. God is probably the securest thing I'm ever going to find. Despite me being energetic and having confidence in myself and my choices, I'm really not very secure. I get nervous more then I let on, I sometimes feel like crying more than anything when I stand there and smile and reassure people that I'm okay, I compare myself to beautiful girls on campus, I worry needlessly about being alone in life, I worry about being somebody, especially since I'm not swimming, and I can't seem to get my life in conrol. Good thing God has it all figured out. I'd be so incredibly lost without him. He provides me with the security I need to be strong in Him. It's a freeing thought, but even when I know that, I struggle with these things every day. Maybe you do too. That's why I'll end with two Bible verses that are bound to leave some comfort. I'm here if anyone wants to talk about sharing these sorts of feelings. We can talk through it together. Thanks for taking the time to read. :)

 

"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

-Psalm 73:26

"'..And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.'"

Matthew 28:20

JOSH GROBAN - "Remember When it Rained"

Simple Sunday Joys

Hello Everyone!

You know what I think? I think Disney is so awesome. Disney movies really do make me feel better sometimes. And, no, it is certainly not childish to like Disney. I mean, I can literally quote the entire Hercules movie without hesitation. And The Lion King, I watched it over break, it makes me cry when Mufasa dies! I don't usually cry during movies, either. I didn't cry during Titanic, nor did I during The Notebook or A Walk to Remember. But, I teared up during The Lion King. What's wrong with that picture?! Oy. Pocahontas also gives me a good feeling. I love it! Of course, I love Indians. I love the concepts, and I love the traditions...when I was little I had Kaya, the American Girl doll who was an Indian! She was my favorite. I think John Smith and Pocahontas are a really good couple in the movie! I mean she just teaches him so much, and he sees her differently. I think it's so cute when he aims his gun at her and then lowers it when he actually sees her. That look he gives her... so cute! And of course, Ariel the mermaid. Obviously I would like her. :)


"So...did they give you a name along with all those rippling pectorals?" -Meg





           

Starting off with Disney today! What else is new?! I've been sort of obsessed with tea lately. I had some tea this morning that was pomegranate white tea. It was amazing! And then I tried some that is called lemon mint herbal tea. That one was quality as well! Don't get me wrong, coffee is still awesome, but tea is better for you and still has a considerable amount of caffeine! Two in one! And, no, this has nothing to do with my Nutrition class...I have had to read two chapters of that this weekend. Those chapters are horribly slow to read...so I got one done yesterday that was 30 pages and successfully completed the notes. Chapter 3 is for today. I also had history and stuff to do. Anyway, nobody wants to hear about my academic efforts at this point!!

People in Texas here are so polite. I mean, you get your occasional polite gentleman in Colorado, but mostly EVERYONE is polite here. Welcome to southern hospitality. I'm hoping I fit right in, but I was going down the stairs yesterday and this guy was just starting to come up them. He turns around and proceeds to go back down a couple stairs and open the door for me and a couple of my friends! I mean, how wonderful is that?! So, gentleman from my beloved state, let this be a lesson for all of you! You guys are pretty good, fine, I'll give you that, haha but some people can learn from these Texas guys!


Church this morning was rather enlightening. It was a wonderful message. The speaker was reminding us that we sometimes tend to see God as a compassionate guy and some sort of BFF when that is not always the case. We spent time in Mark, chapter 1, and he reminded us that God with just a single word can defeat evil. He can take something away just that quick, yet he chooses to be compassionate. He casts the demons out with a single word, and they flee because they know He is boss. How cool is that?! His compassion is only an undeserved perk of being in a relationship with Him. We don't deserve it, yet He gives it without hesitation. Just something to remember.


I leave you with this...I need to remember that the simplest joy of my life right now is walking with Him through thick and thin. There is so much change in my life right now, and I get to walk with Jesus through it all. What else can compare?





 

"'I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.'"
-John 16:33

Reminiscent Reflections and Hopeful Beginnings

Hey guys!


Well, I went to Billy Bob's a couple of nights ago with some friends. And, if you don't know what Billy Bob's is, it is exactly like the Grizzly Rose, except way more fun! I'm dead serious. Anyway, we got into this conversation that really had me thinking. I think I figured out what my greatest fear is. I could never figure it out before because I'm not afraid of heights really, I'm not afraid of needles, and spiders seem very trivial to my actual greatest fear. I'm afraid of losing somebody very dear to me that I can never get back. Like my twin, or a very dear friend. Even if they are a believer, and I'll see them again, I am so afraid of losing them here. I had a dream once that Madison passed away. I woke up just wracked with sobs and tears streaming down. I had to go into her room in the middle of the night to make sure nothing had happened. I'm pretty sure if I got that dreaded phone call that Madison had died, I would just curl up on the floor in physical pain. I can't even imagine. Anyway, that would be my greatest fear.


I know that was a little morbid to start off, but it was something that kind of hit me. Another question we discussed last night was what we thought our greatest quality is. We went around the circle and when my turn came around, I said that I thought mine was loyalty. I'm very loyal to family, friends, boyfriends, and whoever else I'm a part of. I mean, you name it! I never like to give up on people.


I just finished watching Ice Age with a friend before I started writing this blog. A quote that Sid said stuck with me, besides the fact he is hilarious: "You know me, I'm too lazy to hold a grudge!" haha, it is such a fantastic quote. It holds some truth too, I mean I have held grudges before, but they seem so trivial now. I guess it's a good learning process because some grudges I still haven't forgotten, but others are history. It's also good to think about.


I know these thoughts are somewhat random, but flow is not exactly what I'm going for here. I've been struggling with something lately. It seems somewhat trivial, and feels wierd to admit. I've been wondering what guy God has in store for me to be with. I know I'm only a freshman in college, and I know there is plenty of time. Believe me, I'm not wanting to rush things here. But I mean, have I already met him somewhere, or do I have yet to meet him, has he already been in my life, and would he want someone like me? Granted, every girl thinks about these things. It has just been weighing on my heart lately. Sometimes I miss having someone there, I miss some things in my past. I don't regret any of it, it's just hard waiting for that. But hope is never lost :), and God has a way of working things out haha!

Something a little more lighthearted, I seriously love all the people here at TCU. I love the randomness and the kindness in the people around me. We all really do have separate struggles, and different life stories to tell. I love the uniqueness. They make life a little more bearable at times. Going to a new state I thought it would be difficult to make friends. It wasn't. God opened the door for me, and I went into it, not without slight hesitation! But I couldn't be happier. :) Thanks for reading.

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."

-Romans 12:12

Reasons For My Blog

Hello all,

Well, here I am. I haven't visited this blog in a couple of years. But, blogging doesn't seem like such a bad idea. I mean, I've always enjoyed writing, and, hey, sometimes I like writing my thoughts down. I have a few reasons why I'm starting this blog. So, let's get into them...

1) The title of my blog does have a special significance. It has to do with my faith. It's crazy to think that all the time we spend getting our lives in order is only the span of the snap of a finger compared to eternity. It's kind of a scary thought considering I've put a lot of effort and thought into the life I have now. But this journey only lasts a lifetime, whereas the journey that awaits is much, much, much longer. Longer than I can even wrap my little human mind around. So, part of this blog will be a testament to my faith and the daily struggles I encounter.

2) The picture on my blog is of very special significance. I love the "Footprints in the Sand" poem. It has brought me comfort over the years, so I thought it appropriate. After each post I want to end with a bible verse that has been weighing on my heart. They are always good to have, and always a source of learning.

3) This blog is going to be a place where I share some of my experiences. College is an entire new experience on its own, and the amazing people I meet have had quite an influence in my life so far. They deserve to know that they have impacted my life.

4). Mainly, this blog is just a place where I can vent, share some revelations, and just document some of my greatest experiences. I mean, college only lasts so long, right? Why not get started now. I'm in a new state, growing in my faith, and my whole lifelong career awaits me.

So, welcome to my blog. You will learn more about me as my posts grow. There is always more to learn about someone even if you feel you know them well enough. Remember, this is the shortest journey of all.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

-Philippians 4:13